The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize