mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
