Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize