Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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