Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
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