Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Randomize
