FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
