I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
