Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
