Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
