i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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