you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize