No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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