Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
It's like God shit irony all over that family
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
They have beer where we have blood.
Randomize
