Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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