Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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