You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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