Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
You need a sexual gate keeper
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
