I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize