yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Randomize
