hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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