dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
