How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
either way he was missing a nipple.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize