I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
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