What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Randomize
