I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
