You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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