It's just like the Real World with babies
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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