gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Randomize
