Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize