What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
