After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
smell my finger.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Randomize
