due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
