What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Randomize
