We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Randomize
