youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
soo... how was my night?
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