did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
