Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Are my feet made of real feet?
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
i need some magic done to my vagina
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
