Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
