I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
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