It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
