I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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