I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
