I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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