From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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