Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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