She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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