I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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