Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
