xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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