everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
