its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
